No Jokes, Sarcasm, or Hidden Meanings

I have always had a hard time differentiating between sarcasm, a joke, or reading between the lines. I am extremely sensitive at times and will misread a situation quickly. It’s always been a problem for me. I also obsess over what someone has said to me and what they actually meant.

This almost always happens with men. I don’t know how to read them. I spent most of my interactions with men drunk. Then when I first tried sober I was so hurt by the person I didn’t know what to do. I dislike it when a person won’t come out and tell the truth. They joke and dance around the subject. I’d rather be back with the low lifes I used to hang out with, at least they are honest and you know where you stand.

I still talk to a man I used to work with for years and had a “friendship” with. It probably isn’t healthy but he is the only one who notices when something is off with me and worries. We were best friends and flirted a lot when working together. Customers thought we were married. When I would ask him if he had a girlfriend he would say “Don’t believe what you hear”. When I would try to get an answer about how he felt about me he avoided the question. He would then go out of his way to see me and call constantly. I was young and confused and I think his family issues played a big part in things. He’s married now with children. I’m in a better place mentally and he understands how he acted years ago was hurtful.

Of course he said something recently that I took the wrong way and still have not cleared things up with him. He went back to his old ways of pretending he didn’t know what I was talking about. I think I’ll just leave it alone. It isn’t worth the hassle. Yes we get along like brother and sister but there will always be an underlying issue that we don’t talk about.